President Trump, About Your Diet– We’d Like to Help

President Donald Trump
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW
Washington, DC
20500

Dear President Trump,

We heard you’re not doing so well with your diet. We get it; you love your fast food staples like Domino’s, McDonald’s and KFC. Who doesn’t love a good chicken tender and burger patty every now and then? It IS America, right? And exercise? Psh. The average American says they don’t have time for that let alone the President of the United States.

Well, we hear your cry for help and we’re here for you. We can’t have our President being unhealthy and we definitely don’t want you getting stuck in the White House bathtub. So, diet delivery service, Personal Trainer Food wants to offer you 1 full year of free food.

The best part? Those chicken tenders and burger patties you love so much are actually acceptable on this diet (minus the grease)! Sounds crazy, right? We’re all about good tasting proteins and veggies (it’s time you get familiar with those). All you’ll need is a microwave. The White House has one of those, right? And an appetite, which it’s clear you do.

On the Personal Trainer Food program you don’t have to exercise. So basically, little effort and a lot of pay out. You see, it’s literally the perfect diet for you, Mr. Trump.

We just want to keep you healthy, Mr. President, and Personal Trainer Food is here to do just that.

Let us know if the shipping address is good.

~From your concerned citizens at Personal Trainer Food

P.S. The maple sausage is amazing!

DISCLAIMER: PTF is in support of one goal, getting people healthy and caring about helping people lose weight. We understand that politics can be a very sensitive subject with people, and it is with the purest of intentions that this letter was written.