Trying to lose weight and be social can be difficult.
You might have it all under control, but it can seem like your friends and family will do anything to undermine your resolve.
Here are four winning strategies you can use to gracefully take charge of your goals and enjoy any social situation.
How to Handle Food Pushers
What they say: Why don’t you have some of my sugar-coma kit-kat casserole? I made this just for you! But this is your favorite, you must have some!
It gets really tricky when Mom or Grandma are pushing you to eat; if you say no it’s like saying you don’t love them anymore.
Round 1: Say thank you. Genuinely let them know how much you love and appreciate them, but stick to what you are eating.
“Oh Aunt Sylvia, I just adore you but I’m going to finish what’s on my plate first, thank you!”
Round 2: If they continue to offer unwanted foods, explain how much you are enjoying the food you are eating, and how full you are getting. If you can, point out something they made that you are eating and compliment them on that dish.
“This is all so good, I don’t think I can possibly eat any more!” and/or “Your Brussels sprouts are divine, I’ve completely stuffed myself with them.”
Round 3: Offer to take left overs home instead. Once at home, you can give the food to someone who would enjoy it.
“I’ll tell you what, if there is any left, I’d love to take some home with me.”
How to Discourage Party Persuaders
What they say: Why aren’t you drinking? Oh lighten up and have a drink! Don’t be a bore!
People who drink feel the need to make sure everyone else is drinking with them, don’t they? While they may be persistent, it is possible to fend them off and still enjoy the evening.
Round 1: First, you don’t ever have to explain why you do or don’t drink. It’s OK to say no to a party pusher.
“Hey man, no thanks– I’m having a great time already!”
Round 2: Have a non-alcoholic or decoy mocktail in hand. Raise your glass or take a sip. If you have to say any more than that…
“I just don’t feel like drinking tonight.” or “Thanks, but I need to drive home.”
Round 3: The good news with people who have been drinking is that it’s easy to distract them.
“Hey, it looks like the dart board is free, let’s play a round!” or “Tell me all about that vacation you took last month!”
How to Handle Dietary Pundits
What they say: Why aren’t you eating? Are you on another diet? I tried those low-carb diets and they just don’t work. Aren’t you trying to lose weight?
Ah, the dietary police– they may think that their comments are helpful, but they just suck your enjoyment out of the moment.
Round 1: Telling them that your diet is none of their business would be the direct way to go, but it may end your enjoyment of this social event. Let them know instead that this is a choice– without sounding defensive.
“I appreciate your concern, but I love eating this way.” or “Thanks, but I got this!”
Round 2: If they press on, tell them how much you are enjoying your meal. If you can, get them to agree with you on how good it is too.
“Broccoli is one of my favorite foods, and I’m really enjoying it tonight!” and/or “Aunt Annie’s broccoli is the best, don’t you agree?”
Round 3: Turn the tables on them. Offer them the foods you are eating. If you are feeling bold, explain some of the health benefits of eating those foods. It’s hard to argue about your food choices if they are justifiably healthy.
“Have you tried these Tomato Caprese Bites yet? They’re delicious!” and/or “Did you know this Apple Salad has a ton of fiber and vitamin C?”
How to Handle Body Critics
What they say: Do you really think you should be eating that? Have you put on some weight? You’re losing too much weight! You’re just skin and bones … and even excessive comments about how good you look can get awkward fast.
Many people simply don’t realize how rude these comments can be.
Round 1: Unfortunately in most social situations, you probably won’t to be able to explain how you honestly feel. One way to shut down thoughtless comments is with a short, polite conversation-ender.
“Thank you.” or “Thanks for your concern.”
Round 2: If they don’t get the hint, take the emphasis off of body-centric comments by shifting the discussion to healthier topics. In doing this you are setting the conversational example to avoid evaluating or judging how a person looks.
“You know, I feel really great right now. I have so much more energy and can sleep better since I reduced my sugar intake.”
If they aren’t taking the high road with you, don’t be afraid to go as mundane as talking about the weather either: “How about the weather we’re having? Crazy, huh?”
Round 3: If they continue to badger you with unwanted comments, it’s ok to gracefully exit the conversation and walk away. Who knows, they may learn to avoid body-centric comments when there is nobody to listen to them. Find people you can converse with about more entertaining topics.
“Excuse me while I go get a refill…” or “My apologies, I need to check on…” should do. You could also glance at your phone and say “Oh pardon me, I have to get this.”
And remember this: you never have to compromise your goals or how your feel about yourself because of what others do or say.
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About the Writer: 100 pounds ago, Jan knew what it is like to be obese, unhappy, and stuck. She has spent the last 17 years as a fitness writer, trainer, yoga teacher, and Weight Loss Coach. Today, she’s proud to be a part of the Personal Trainer Food team so she can continue her goal to help others live their fullest lives possible. Email [email protected] if you have any questions!
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